HAYYYYY!! OK ........ I just watched Gov. Sarah Palin's resignation speech twice [thanks to the incredible website/blogger Joe at http://www.joemygod.blogspot.com/]. I watched Sarah twice and still could not understand what she was talking about. I heard her mention the word "resigning," but everything else was all over the place. Naturally, this led me to ask some questions:

1. Sarah was once a vice-presidential nominee, and the current governor of Alaska. She is resigning as governor for unknown reasons. She holds a press conference in her backyard, and when the camera pans the rapt audience .. there are only 20 to 25 people! What Sarah? No Twitter? Where was everybody? Heading for MJ's funeral?

2. She went on and on about some basketball analogy that I could not understand. Did anyone in Alaska know that this woman REALLY wanted to play for the WNBA? Maybe Sarah is really a Sappho Sister?

3. Will her resignation ruin her contract negotiations with Lens Crafters? Or those people that sell that hair pony tail thingy on TV around 2:00 AM?

4. On a personal note, what will happen to Todd Palin? Because Daaaaaaaaam! He could have a new career as the Brawny paper towel man, or the new Diet Coke guy!

5. Will this ruin the modeling/cover story/shoe-in for a reality series career of Bristol Palin's boyfriend, and the father of Sarah's grandchild, Levi Johnston? And you know some child talent agency needs to give Piper Palin her own Disney series! What was that child wearing at the press conference attended by 10?

6. Did you notice that Sarah never thanked her staff? Besides talking about basketball, she went on and on about her kids. Did she not have a staff?

7. And the question that I'm sure is on La Toya Jackson's mind, as well as mine .. why exactly is she quitting?

Meanwhile, back at the Hall of Justice ........